Feeling Overwhelmed Starting Dad Parenting?

“Honey, I’ll handle everything today!”

I confidently sent my wife out, but as soon as the front door closed, cold sweat started running down my back. Left alone in the house with a sweet little child, it felt both tranquil and like an enormous unknown world. Intellectually, I knew that parenting was not just a mom’s responsibility, but when it came to the actual execution, it was overwhelming not knowing where to begin. For those like me who want to become a ‘good dad’ but are unsure of how to proceed, I hope my chaotic day can bring you some courage. It’s okay to be awkward. We have the love for our children within us.

A Morning Filled with First Times

I woke up this morning to the sound of my child stirring, beating the alarm clock. Today, I wanted to start my child’s day with a fresh diaper and a delicious breakfast. I prepared beef and vegetable stir-fried rice seasoned with baby soy sauce, following a recipe I had researched earlier. But plans are just that—plans. Despite my efforts, my child, unfamiliar with dad’s touch, kept crying, and the ambitiously prepared meal ended up mostly on the floor. I was flustered at first, but quickly regained my composure. I believed that it wasn’t the perfect meal that mattered, but rather the effort dad makes for you. After cleaning up the fallen food and giving my child a banana they love, they finally cracked a smile. I realized that the first step of dad parenting is not about perfection, but adaptability based on my child’s expressions.

Truly Being ‘With’ Your Child

With a contented full belly, my child signaled it was playtime. As I pondered what to do, surrounded by toys in the living room, my child showed interest not in the cars or dinosaur robots but in the spatula from the kitchen drawer. Initially, I wanted to say, “No!” but held back. In a child’s world, even a spatula can be an excellent toy. I decided to follow my child’s curiosity. They used the spatula to move blocks and tapped the floor, exploring the sound it made. I simply observed and responded with comments like “Wow, the spatula turned into a fantastic crane!” and “Tap-tap, that’s a fun sound!” It wasn’t about dad directing play but accompanying my child in their world. That was truly ‘playing together.’

Dad Play, Remember These

• Ensure Safety: First, check if the item your child is exploring is safe.
• Eye Contact: Focus on your child’s actions at their eye level.
• Verbal Response: Describing your child’s actions in words also greatly aids in language development.

This brief playtime taught me a valuable lesson. Dad parenting is not about teaching your child but learning from them about the world.

A Calm Afternoon, and Then a Crisis

The child’s eyelids began to droop after an exciting energy burst. It was finally time for a tranquil nap. A gentle lullaby and soft pats on the back soon had them peacefully asleep. Sipping a cup of coffee in the quiet of a sleeping house felt like ‘Ah, parenting is manageable!’ But the peace didn’t last. After a short nap, my child awoke with inexplicable fussiness and tears—a nap protest crisis. Offering food and cuddles didn’t help; the child rejected everything, and I almost lost my temper in frustration.

“Why are you crying… What did I do wrong?”

I questioned endlessly in my heart, but there were no answers. Then I remembered my wife advising that when a child cries without reason, just hold them close and wait. I held my child tightly, showing them the view outside the window, whispering “It’s okay, daddy’s here. Let’s hang in there a bit longer.” Amazingly, the child’s crying gradually subsided. What my child needed wasn’t a solution but a reassuring embrace and dad’s comforting voice.

Ending the Day with a Warm Ritual

As evening approached, I shared a lovingly prepared, if clumsy, dinner with my child. During bath time, watching my child chatter about the day’s events while splashing water, my day’s fatigue melted away. As bedtime arrived, the highlight of dad parenting remained—reading bedtime stories. I cozily placed my child on my knee, reading the picture book they personally chose, mimicking animal sounds, causing fits of giggles. After finishing the book, switching off the light, I whispered “I enjoyed the day with you, let’s play again tomorrow. Love you,” and my child snuggled deeper into my arms, gently falling asleep. Though imperfect and clumsy throughout the day, seeing my child’s serene face at the end made me realize that dad’s love was well received. You’re a great dad already. It’s okay to start a bit uneasy. Your child can feel all your efforts.

Dad parenting is about sincerity more than perfection. The time spent laughing and getting surprised together becomes the warmest memory for your child. Try practicing today’s parenting tips in your own way. MOM-i always supports the small beginnings of dads like you. If you need dad parenting content planning, feel free to request a plan anytime.